this is a ccarbe
twitter's profile is a poor place to learn about humans, so here is a carrd replacing my cool listography telling other humans about the human typing on the internet
good luck reading it though
also stop accusing me of being a discourse account.
everything i say is me mocking myself because i'm not a discourse account and i argue more than the actual discourse accounts do and i am far less constructive than they are, which is sadder than if i was just a straight-up discourse account.
hell friend
• i obey internet social boundaries at my own discretion, which is generally acceptable to people who encounter me, but it may not be acceptable to you. if the idea of someone being open and forward about sensitive topics and things you personally dislike makes you uncomfortable in any regard, you should not engage with me.
• if my name is important to you, you'll probably know it within a couple days of following me because i reference myself constantly.
• if my pronouns are important to you, you'll probably know them within a couple days of following me because i reference myself constantly.
• i acknowledge the importance of normalising the act of telling ppl your pronouns, how you want to be called, and why it's something many people choose to do. that said: i don't care about being misgendered or misidentified and i care even less about making it easy for strangers to know me personally. as a consequence, i'm not listing it.
• if you're a current friend reading my cooler than listography carrd and are thinking to yourself "that's so fucking stupid. you're being unnecessarily difficult since you don't even hide it", i'd invite you to examine our friendship. if your answer isn't "ok, point, your entire personality is like this and i decided to put up with you for some reason", then you probably have good taste and i congratulate you on your decision to drop me. may your life be better for it.
• i currently reside in 27 skeletons. do not mistake my age for 27. the truth is more complicated: the skeletons all have ages and combined total of the ages of the skeletons will reveal my true age. the skeletons are aged 0 through 72. godspeed to those who are here trying to find my age so they can mock me online.
• my age is rumpelstiltskin but with numbers.
• you should probably be 18+ before deciding you want anything to do with me.
• i had an adult content bot once but i couldn't figure out how to put it on the internet and i no longer use the computer it was in. i miss my adult content bot so i'm going to leave in the section i wrote about it on listography.
twitter banned my adult content bot once and i appealed the decision by telling them: "it does churn out adult content but it's literally a markov bot spitting bad gay erotica spliced with the guinea pig article on wikipedia. i promise no one is aroused by this" and they unbanned it.
• i operate via reciprocity. if you're friendly, i'll be friendly. if you're shitty, i'll be shitty. if you're shitty and have a change of heart and stop being shitty, i will notice the change and immediately stop being shitty in kind.
• if you think "fiction is reality" is a valid reason to attack people on the internet, we're fundamentally incompatible and no good dialogue will happen between us.
• if you think the paragraph above is me stating fiction has zero effect on reality, we're fundamentally incompatible and no good dialogue will happen between us.
• if you're unable to comprehend the fact it's ok to like fucked up and problematic things in a fictional context while still condemning them in reality, we're fundamentally incompatible and no good dialogue will happen between us.
• i derive enjoyment from people clawing after the last word to assert their moral authority in an internet argument. fair warning: you will likely only get the last word if i forget about you, get distracted, or you block me immediately after making your point--which, frankly, says more about your ego than mine since you'd have to tell me off to make yourself feel better even though i wouldn't see your sick burns crafted for your friends to like and praise you over because you've blocked me.
• the above bullet point is petty and childish, but i also derive enjoyment from my childish pettiness. you won't get any argument from me if you laugh at me and call me lame: you'd be right. ...but you'd also be someone who had to tell me that so you could feel superior to me and put me down, which is somehow even more pathetic.
• you should be aware i won't care or feel bad for you if you give yourself a panic attack in the process of arguing with me.
• you are responsible for yourself and it is your responsibility to know your limits. you don't get to make your problems my problem.
• hahahaha you read my carrd what is wrong with you
DA TEAM
docks
clomtap
i do the discord at whymaraner2420 but i doubt you'd want to talk to me unless you already know me and i'll ignore you 95% of the time anyway. it's not personal.
i only have the energy to argue on the internet. when it comes to everything else, i'm pretty much dead.